The Ugly Truth

I recently had to confront what nobody ever wants to admit about themselves, I had to confront the narcissist in me. We’ve characterized narcissists as those who lack ownership, and people that make things all about themselves. I discovered there are so many other common traits that show up daily or pop up on occasions that fly under the radar.

I am known for saying how much I value self-reflection and self-awareness. However, when a friend confronted me about how they were offended by me, my mind began to conjure up their flaws and what I felt their issues were. I started entertaining ideas of how much I have been hurt and what I’ve taken “on the chin”. I felt unappreciated and wasn’t being accepted for being me. I didn’t realize at that moment I was being a narcissist. I didn’t want to take ownership for the pain or discomfort I caused. How dare my friend have any feelings other than how great of a friend I am? I became uncomfortable with the expressed displeasure and wanted to make it their issue.

Oftentimes, those who display narcissistic behavior make everything all about themselves. Giving to others can be wrapped in narcissism if it seeks praise and self-gratification. The problem is if it’s all about you, how do you perform the work needed that’s bigger than you? The gifts that we have aren’t to be for our glory but to be to the benefit of others. Your life’s purpose isn’t about how to make your life better but it’s about how you serve and positively impact the life of another.

To become the best version of ourselves and to be everything God created us to be means that we say “Yes” to our purpose. Becoming the best version of ourselves requires us to shred or extract the things about ourselves that prohibit our growth and ability to give and not just receive.

The success of your purpose is tied to the realization that it isn’t all about you, it’s bigger than you. You will have to acknowledge the ugly truths about yourself and in addition, confront the narcissist in you.